Welcome Isabella Grace!

When we spread news about our becoming pregnant for the 7th time, I had 3 women, all best friends of mine, offer to throw me showers. I told each of the other, but they all insisted on each giving us one, especially once we found out it was a girl. Paula hosted my first shower and Natalie my second shower, before Isabella Grace was born. Jackie and I decided that for the 3rd and final shower, it would be a welcoming shower, since the guests would mostly be family from out of town and would want to meet our little girl. What a great idea that turned out to be!!

My cousin and bestest friend since forever, Jackie, and her sweet husband, Temo, drove all the way down from up north (5 hour drive) with my Tia to set up down here. That is love, right? They set up at a park we have near our house and the weather was beautiful. It was sweet to see my cousins and their beautiful children. To see my Tias' (Mom's sisters). And of course it wouldn't be a party without my SIL, Natalie, and her family(Nat, thanks for always being so supportive of us. That you came, even in your condition, is so selfless!)! To have my MIL be there. But, the sweetest gift that day was having my Grandma, whom just turned 95 yesterday, come and get to meet Isabella Grace for the first time.




The princess did sleep most of the time in her Gramita's arms, but she looked so peaceful. Tim and I would like to thank everyone that drove for hours to get here. It means so much to us all... the time, effort, and love you put into our family. It is a sweet example of what family should be. You not only showered Isabella Grace with such generous gifts; but, also with your love and support!

I did have to add (For you veteran mommies) a funny tidbit. My beautiful cousin, Vanessa, whom is a young co-ed up in Irvine, gave Isabella Grace a big box of diapers as a gift. We couldn't help but laugh (All us veteran mommies) when we saw what size they were: 5. You mama's know that size 5's are for BIG babies! My 2 year old never even got to wear that size before he was potty trained! The box says, 'for 27 pounds and over'. When Jackie pointed this out to Vanessa, Vanessa says, "I didn't even know they came in sizes!" Remember the days before you knew everything about diapers? Which to use, the sizes, the characters that are etched on them? That feels like centuries ago to me! Thanks for the laugh, Vanessa! And a big heartfelt thanks to Jackie, Temo, and their little man for all the blessings they bestowed upon us this past Saturday. You made it memorable for us in more ways than one!!! We love you and Isabella Grace can't wait to see you all again.



QUE DIOS BENDIGA MI FAMILIA!

Calling All Prayer Warriors

Sweet Stellan. He needs our prayers. He needs for you to take a minute from going about your day doing the 'regular' things in life and lift him up, and his Mama, and his Daddy, and his brothers, and sister. This sweet little man has already endured so much, and most of us bloggers know the charming family well. But, if you don't know MckMama, check out her blog and Stellan's story here.

Stellan is a miracle baby and we have seen God working through them, through prayer, and through so many prayer warriors all over the world.

Please, pray for Stellan.

The Birth Story, Part 3: Isabella Grace

*If you haven't read part 1 of the birth story you can click here to read it... or click here to read part 2.*

Now, only 5 weeks overdue, the ACTUAL birth story...

JUNE 16th, 2009, TUESDAY MORNING:

5:06am- Just woke up and I can't believe I am still pregnant! I really thought it was going to be last night, but... this little one, is just too content in there. Well, you never know, it could happen today...yeah, right.

5:08am- I get up and go brush my teeth. Figure I better brush my hair and do some makeup in case today is the day. I don't feel any different than yesterday, or the day before, but I refuse to go into labor and not look presentable. Lipstick is a must at all times!

5:16am- Is that a contraction? Lasted around 30 seconds. Hmm, feels a bit more all over than the ones from the last few weeks. Well, you never know. Better let Tim know that today could be the day so that he can be prepared to possibly miss work today.

5:17am- Tell Tim today could be the day, so just be aware. Go back to finish my hair, and here comes another one. Whoa, that was only a minute apart. This is a little stronger than last. This is totally labor. I mean, believe me, I know labor when it hits. After this many babies, there is no doubt.

5:18am- Waddle over to Tim, whom is still waking up from the 1st contraction, only a minute ago, and tell him I am positive this is labor and we should be ready to leave asap, but not before I put on my makeup...he goes to wake up Karizma whom is going to be in the labor room this time.

5:20am- They are coming fast and strong. What happened to the 10 minutes apart and having to wonder if it was true labor or not? We can't take chances, so we better hurry it up. I know my last labor was 90 minutes, but that was a fluke, remember? Still, I start to think that better safe than sorry, or else a helicopter will end up having to pick me up off this mountain.

5:21am- Where is Timmy? He should totally be in here getting ready to leave any minute. There he is, in the kitchen, pouring himself a bowl of Cocoa Puffs, like he has no care in the world. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!! COCOA PUFFS?!! WE HAVE TO GO, TIMMY!"

5:30am- Karizma is dressed and ready. Miguel has loaded Tim's car with all my hospital stuff. I wake up Walker, like I had promised I would do, in case I went into labor while he was asleep. He is so happy and excited and says "today my sister will be born."

5:37am- Go and check what is taking Tim so long. He seems to be a bit out of it and has gotten dressed for work. Nice slacks, dress shoes, and pressed dress shirt. Too bad he hasn't gotten around to doing his hair, which usually takes him a good 15 minutes. He is very, very, very particular about his hair. The hair will have to wait, because these contractions are NOT letting up, coming every minute, for 30 seconds, and I cannot walk or talk through them. Man, this is happening much faster than I thought it would.

5:45am- Finally getting in the car, about to head down this BUMPY dirt road. Tim seems pretty concerned about us making it to the hospital. Karizma is in the back seat pretty quiet. I hope that I am not scaring her, because the contractions are pretty strong now. Good thing the dirt road is only about 3 miles long.

5:51am- Only about 1 mile left to go on the dirt road, but you can tell that with every minute that passes, as does a contraction, Tim gets more and more anxious. He asks if we can call 911 so that we can meet an ambulance at the fire station on our way to the freeway. I tell him it would be more time stopping and getting into the ambulance and that we should just keep heading down to the hospital.

5:52am- Tim is now begging for me to let him call 911. A total submission comes over me as I hate seeing him so upset and I tell him to go ahead and call. In the meantime Karizma calls my Mom, whom has never missed one of my babies being born and then calls our sweet friend Bette, whom we have also invited to watch Isabella's birth.

5:58am- The 911 operator does not get that we live in a very rural area. She wants us to stop and wait for the ambulance. Yeah, right. Tim tells her no. He tells her over and over that we will meet them at the fire station that is enroute to the freeway exit.

6:04am- I see about 5 firefighters standing in front of the station. The ambulance is out on the driveway, ready to go, and the gurney pulled out. I start to cry. "There aren't any women! Oh, Lord, these guys are so big! How are they going to know what to do?!" How I want my Mom right now. They are very strong now, and coming so close together that I don't have concept of time, or much else, for that matter.

6:10am- I am strapped into the gurney. Strapped in. How am I supposed to labor like this? My legs are closed together and have a harness over my shoulders and chest. This is sooo uncomfortable. I want to be back in Timmy's Camry and those comfy leather seats! The firefighter at my side looks like a linebacker for a pro football team. Lord, help me!

6:27am- I look out the window. I can see cars and familiar places. I have managed to wriggle one of my legs out of the lower strap and am trying to give myself some wiggle room up top. The contractions are on top of eachother and I realize it has only been an hour. I am ready to admit to myself and anyone else that the 90 minute labor with my last baby was indeed not a fluke!

6:30am- I see El Cajon, which is a little city on the way to the hospital, which is still a good 15 minutes away, out of the window. I also see traffic. Lots of it. There is an accident just ahead. I ask the linebacker to just take me to the nearest hospital because I think the baby is coming very soon. I just know it. HE says not to worry, that we have plenty of time. I can tell he feels bad for me, because I am moaning and groaning through my contractions. Yeah, they are strong, but managable. He lays a hand on my shoulder to comfort me and I am truly touched by his kindness.

6:38am- I tell the linebacker at my side that the baby is coming. I have to push. The firefighter behind me, that looks a lot like Tim's Uncle Gene, tells the linebacker to check me. He lifts the blanket and says, like I am not there, "No, she has a long way to go. She isn't even crowning yet." I am thinking to myself, I haven't crowned since my 3rd baby! They just come out now! You want some crowning... I'll show you some crowning! I did warn the linebacker that I was going to push, and again he lays a hand on my shoulder and looks me in the eye and says, "Just do what you know to do. You can do this." I can tell he is saying it to be kind and supportive, but not because he actually thinks I am going to pop this baby out in about 2 seconds.

2 Seconds later: One push and Isabella's head is now out. I quietly tell the linebacker that the baby's head is now out. He looks at me like he feels bad for me because I must be delusional, but will check to humor me. He lifts up that blanket again and if I could bottle the look on his face, it would make me laugh all day long. He obviously could not believe it and says to the other firefighter, "The baby is coming! The baby is coming!" All this is happening in what feels like slow motion, but is actually going so fast. Within another push her shoulder is out, than another, and she is laying on the gurney between my legs. No one to catch her. How I longed to be able to reach down and grab her to put her against my chest. But, as they lifted the blanket off me I noticed all the meconium. They started to wipe her off and I looked out the window so I could get some idea of where my baby had been born. Yep, figures. On 8 freeway in front of the Costco and Babies R Us. (Two of our favorite places.) I started to get serious twangs of guilt that Tim had missed her birth, and Karizma, and Bette, and especially my Mom. But, looking at her made it all better. I loved how the linebacker looked at her with such wonderment on his face and he admired her cooing at her saying, "You are so pretty and pink!"

6:48am- We are now parked in front of the hospital. We have been sitting her for a few minutes as the firemen finish up some paperwork and then cut the cord. They call time of birth now, although it was actually 10 minutes ago. They finally hand her to me and it is awkward with all the straps, but she is so beautiful and I can't contain the tears and joy and emotion. They swing the back doors open and there is Tim and Karizma with big 'I knew it' smiles on their faces. As they strolled me through the halls of the hospital one of the firemen asked a nurse where labor and delivery was. She says, as we all board the elevator, "Having a baby, huh?" D U H!!! Everyone just gave her a look like she must be kidding, since I am holding her. Funny how everything around me is a blur. I only have eyes for her right now. Faces, hallways, rooms all just blend in together. I do apologize to Tim and Karizma for not being able to make Isabella wait. They are so sweet about the whole thing.

As they get me situated in the room I do take a minute to look at her, finally, and determine that, yes, she is truly a girl. Her skin is so pretty and pink, like the linebacker said. She has soft light brown hair, like her Daddy's. She is so squishy and warm and precious. I am in love, love, love. Isabella, you, my sweet girl, are an answer to prayer. The desire of my heart.

My Mom finally makes it down. The Hammang's arrive. My sister, Elisa, brings all the boys down to meet her. It is a birthday party in my room. Everyone rejoicing and joining together in prayers of thankfulness for her safe arrival. I know that Tim is saying a quiet prayer of thanks that I did not deliver a meconium covered baby on his nice leather seats, in the car that he won't even let the boys wear their shoes in. And I say a prayer of thankfulness for the Holy Spirit that had me be a submissive wife and listen to my husband about calling 911. It would have been heartbreaking to not have a suction for Isabella in Tim's car because there is NO DOUBT she would have been born in that Camry. The rest of the day is sweet and we count down the minutes until we can take our new baby doll home. Sometimes, well, most times, life does not go according to your plan and Isabella ends up spending 11 days in the NICU. However, we are thankful for the doctors that caught the meconium aspiration as it could have been a real serious mess if we had taken the baby back up the mountain.

Thanks to everyone that prayed for her, has continued to pray, and for your patience to hear my story. The day of her birth I thought it was funny. While she was in the NICU, I placed blame on that ambulance and the firemen. We spent a lot of time in prayer for her and what she was going through. She even had a brain scan done while in there that the doctors were concerned about. It showed a cyst on her brain. The one that the tech, at 36 weeks pregnant, had said was gone, was actually still present. The doctors determined that it was the CPC from before and affirmed it was nothing to worry about. I see how the Lord had us be blind to the knowledge that it remained on her brain during this ordeal so that we would be focused on the real issue at hand. Now, I see how God used it to grow me. Us. How it taught me to build up hope. And, God doesn't want me wallowing in playing the blame game. She is healthy now and instead the Lord is pushing me to pray for those wonderful men in that ambulance and their firehouse and their safety. I am humbled by their sweetness, their gentleness with me, and the apparent joy that they had in bringing Isabella into the world. We look forward to thanking them again soon.

Now, if we can figure out how to get a birth certificate for this little one. We have to jump through hoops, and provide lots of proof of things, and get statements from those that saw her come into the world, and present her to the offices that take care of this stuff downtown. It is going to be a hassle, but, she is worth it all.

You Are A Winner!

You are a winner, Dani Joy... in more ways than one, but for today, you are the winner of the caption contest! You have the choice of a Starbucks card (Do they have Starbucks in Spain??) or an ITunes card. If neither work for you, let me know and we will work something out.

Thanks to everyone that participated by entering or voting or both. You guys rock! By the way, Tim wanted me to add that he did not like the 'acne' entry by our son, Miguel, and was very surprised I picked it. I had to explain to him that the reason I loved it so much is because it was the most true to life, meaning that our little Isabella has been plagued with quite the bad case of baby acne, so it was too funny to see the spin Miguel had put on that picture. It made me laugh.

Have a blessed day!

Birth Story, Part 2: Isabella Grace

***First things first.. don't forget to vote for your favorite caption on the side bar! Contest closes tomorrow night at 9pm, pst. To check out the choices click here! Again, thanks for participating!***

---------------------------

Yes, a dream come to life in the name of Isabella Grace. We were overjoyed and started to tell everyone that we were finally having another girl. Karizma was beside herself and the boys started to talk about what great big brothers they were going to be. Miguel talked about how Isabella would never cry because he wouldn't allow it to ever happen and that her feet would never touch the ground because he would always be holding her.

Then exactly a week after our 20 week sonogram, I got the most distressful call. It was a Kaiser doctor calling to talk about the findings from her sonogram. They had found a cyst on her brain. You can't imagine how time stood still when I heard those words. A CYST ON HER BRAIN. I fell into the chair next to the stack of laundry. The doctor said that this cyst, known as Choroid Plexius Cyst, was nothing to worry about unless she had other signs of problems (such as webbed hands, clubbed feet, heart problems... this would mean the possibility of Trisomy 18, which meant the odds of losing our baby to miscarriage or her being stillborn were extremely high). We started to pray for our little girl and tried not to think about her being taken away from us before we even got to really enjoy her. Love her. Hold her. God gave us peace about the CPC and we started to buy little pink shoes, little hairbands, and little brown haired dollies. We went back for another ultrasound at 36 weeks and the tech told us that he did not see the cyst any longer. Although, we knew at this point that she was alright and the cyst was nothing at all to worry about (research shows not one case of adverse affects due to the cyst), we were rejoicing and so happy.

We also found out, at 33 weeks, that she was breech. I was terrified of having a c-section. We prayed, sought out prayer, and had a breech version done at 37 weeks to try and turn her around. God is so good, and she turned without any problem. The procedure was pain free for me and I saw God in all those details, as well.

The Lord blessed us with everything a little girl would need before she even arrived. She was showered with dresses of every color, shoes of every size, and her very first bible from Tia Susan and Tio Manny... might I add that this bible is glittery pink with rhinestones and has her name engraved on the front? Now that is a bible! We were counting down the days... and days, because her due date, June 10th, came and went. I waddled around, feeling really great, and pretty much every day thought, 'This is it!' But, it never was. My main concern was making sure that I would have make-up on and hair done for when she arrived... all those pictures, you know! Tim's main concern was getting me to the hospital on time since my last labor was only 90 minutes, and we lived out in the middle of nowhere, on a mountain, off a dirt road, 45 minutes from the hospital. "We'll make it, Baby!", I said, "Last time was just a fluke." Hmm... well, on June 16th, at 5:18am, we got to see if last time really was a fluke...

Isabella Grace Is One Month Old Today... And The Contest

Our little girl is 1 month old today. I have dealt with a lot of different emotions the last month.

Joy, Fear, Sadness, Hope, laughter, helplessness, thankfulness, doubt, confusion, exhaustion, brokenness, fulfillment, compassion, loneliness, humility, and joy again... to name a few, and in no exact order.

To finally get to meet our daughter. But, then to be kept from touching her, let alone holdind her, for almost a week, was heart breaking, but humbling, as well.

To then bring her home, but feel like 2 weeks were, in a sense, stolen from my time with her, that I was gipped, was consuming me some of these past nights. I was telling the Lord, "I feel like I am 2 weeks behind everyone. 2 weeks behind a newborns feeding needs. 2 weeks behind my body trying to recuperate. 2 weeks behind my husband and his needs. 2 weeks behind our friends and family that I know what to see the baby, but I dare not come off the mountain for fear of still not having the nursing down. 2 weeks behind the rest of the world that has continued to spin, regardless of my pity party."

The Holy Spirit impressed on me this verse that I have clung to often the past few years, especially when dealing with Tim and his spinal cord injury:

"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:3-5

Why wasn't I recalling all the answered prayer? How the Lord had answered the desires of our hearts? Why was I dwelling on the suffering, instead of rejoicing in it? Why, the Word of God says that suffering produces perserverance, and that produces character, and that hope!!! And just like God's Word says, hope did not disappoint. Our Isabella is home with us. Healthy. God truly poured out his love unto our family by bringing Isabella Grace into our family. So, on this day, 1 month after she came into this world, I will rejoice, rejoice, rejoice!!

Care to join me?






Some of Isabella's favorite things at one month old:

"My big sister and 4 big brothers"



"Bath time with my brothers looking on, while they take a bath, too"



"Talking to my Mommy as she sings her 'Purty Grace, Purty-Purty Grace' song to me over and over and over..."



"And Mama's milk, of course!"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now, for the caption contest... naming the picture below of my niece, Sonoma, holding Isabella Grace.



There were lots of great entries, and I can't seem to pick just one. Will you help me decide? The winner gets a choice of giftcard to Starbucks or ITunes. (Please submit your vote for your favorite on the poll on the TOP of my sidebar. The poll closes Monday night at 9pm, pst.)

Choose from these great ones:

1. Tammy on the go said:
"Is she mine?"



2. Cheesemakin' Mama said:
"Mommy in the making"



3. Miguel said:
"I have the perfect thing for that acne!"



4. Dani Joy said:
"One day I want one just like you."



5. Karizma said:
"God was not lying when he said he fearfully and wonderfully made you!"



And an honorable mention goes to my baby Daddy, Tim, for his entry:
"A touch is worth a thousand words."

Thanks so much to everyone that joined in. A special shout out to Nicole for de-lurking... I knew you could do it, girl!

With In Laws Like Mine...

Life is so much sweeter!!! (What did you think I was going to say?!?!) I know I have written posts about my wonderful parents, but hadn't taken the time to do so about my in laws. I could write a mega long post about how wonderful and amazing my father and mother in law are. But, I will cut it down a little to a mini tribute to these two generous and kind pair. Ever since I met Marty and Kathy (Although, I have never called them that... it seemed wrong... so I waited until Tim and I got married and started to call them Mom and Dad immediately.) They not only welcomed me whole heartedly, they welcomed Miguel and Karizma with so much love and never treated them any less than they would have treated a biological grandchild. They have always gone above and beyond for us; for all of their sons and grandchildren. I can say, with all honesty, that never once have they said they couldn't help when we have asked them to help with the kiddos.. Although, there was this one time that my MIL had already made plans, and had a meeting to attend, but when I asked if she could watch the kids, said she would cancel her meeting and have them work around her... I told her absolutely not.

That is the kind of MIL I have.






My FIL is always checking on us to make sure we are ok, and feeling well. He is a very genuine man and I admire him so much because he has raised 3 wonderful sons to be loving and caring husbands. Tim talks about the kind of father my FIL was and I see so much of how Tim parents mirroring what he had done with his boys. Recently my FIL suggested they could take all the kiddos for an overnight stay, except for the nursing babe-of course. "YES, PLEASE DO!", I said.



That is the kind of FIL I have.

The kids had been stuck in the house for so long due to the NICU and now to having a newborn home, and my in laws gave them some relief at the beach. I was so blessed that they would do this for the kids. The boys had a blast 'surfing' with Grandad and playing on the swings with Grandmom. But, Walker could not stop talking about their picnic on the patio. My MIL and FIL take the time to really listen to them, do things with them, and praise them. My kids feel 10 feet tall around them.

I don't know that my in-laws signed up to have this many grandkids... 10 now with Isabella, and #11 coming at the end of the year... but, they have bent over backwards for each of us. I know Natalie could write a novel about all they did for their family while she was in the hospital with Gracen last year.

I tell my in laws that I sure hope I can be the kind of in law to my children's future spouses, that they have been to me. I am always so touched by their generosity, their genuine concern for each of us, and that they keep up with us all the time. I knew that this family was special once I knew I could go in their house, open the fridge, and get whatever I wanted out of it, without thinking twice. That was a big step for me and it dawned on me that it made me one of them... The first 'White' girl to join the family.

So, Mom and Dad, thank you for loving me through the last 10 years. Because of you, I have the sweetest, most tender husband, whom in turn is just as sweet and tender a father. You both have brought me much joy, made me laugh, made me think, and made me strive to become a better person and Godly woman. I love you both so much, and praise God for loving me enough to make me 'White'.

I also want to congratulate Mom and Dad... this Saturday is their 39th wedding anniversary!! Praise God!

The White's at Disneyland February of 2008.

The Birth Story, Part 1: Isabella Grace

***But, first, don't forget to put down an entry for the caption contest!!! The winner gets a Starbucks giftcard! Entries accepted until this Thursday, 9pm, pst. ***

What would you use as a caption for this picture of my niece, Sonoma, holding Isabella Grace?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, my birth story, in bits and pieces, because it's my blog and I can make you wait if I want to...

I couldn't believe that this handsome, tall, not so dark, super intelligent, and ambitious man loved me. ME! From the moment that the Holy Spirit made it clear that Tim was to be my husband some day, I started to envision our future children. Isabella was on my heart already.

Once Timmy went away to law school in Washington, D.C, we started to spend countless hours on the phone. We talked about everything. Our hopes, desires, and what we dreamed for our future together. We weren't even engaged at this point, but we talked about baby names. "If it is a boy, how about Matthew, like your middle name?", I said to Timmy. "And if it is a girl, I love the name Isabella." He loved it, too. I had loved that name since I was 18 and read a book about a girl that lived in Italy with the same name. She was a beautiful girl with dark skin and long dark hair, and darker eyes. I guess that is why I always imagined our Isabella the same way. We talked about middle names. Tim and I thought that Grace sounded so beautiful with Isabella. So, our hearts desire for Isabella Grace began 10 years ago.

Tim and I really did not care if we had a little girl or a little boy every time we became pregnant. We really had no desire towards either gender. However, the only gender on which we agreed on a name, from back before we were ever even engaged, was for a little girl. And since we never would find out the gender, I would always bring a ziploc bag with boy things and girl things to the hospital. Each time, I would have to pull out the 'blue' bag and put the 'pink' ziploc back in the Isabella Grace box we had started 10 years before, too. (We had bought a baby gift for a friend that thought she was having a girl, had a boy, and Tim said we should just keep the little girl outfit for when we had our first daughter... this outfit became the first item in the Isabella Grace box.) And since we usually could not agree or settle on a boy name, we would spend those last couple of hours in prayer, and deep discussion about what we should name this new little man in our life. We weren't disappointed that it was another boy, but would laugh that we always had a girl name, but never a girl.

What joy I was experiencing with my older son and daughter and my 3 little guys. Sheer joy! However, Tim and I knew that God could very well bless us again soon. At this point I think I was secretly desiring a little girl. A little girl that was half Timmy, half me. Everyone knew that this was Karizma's deepest desire and had been for many years.. to have a little sister. Tim started to talk about having a little girl, too. I became pregnant for the 7th time and the 'girl' desires became very, very, very much a part of each of our hearts. Tim started to ask anyone willing to listen, including my blogger friends, to pray for a little girl. What a sweet answer to prayer it was on Christmas Eve when the sonogram technician told us that was exactly what we were expecting. It was instantly that we started to call her by name. Isabella Grace was no longer just a desire in our hearts, she was now a dream come to life.

Sorry I Was MIA...So, How About Some Q And A... And A Contest, Too?!!

Isabella Grace is 3.5 weeks old and I seem to have forgotten just how time consuming it is to have a newborn at home. You would think I would have it figured out, with 5 other similar experiences, but I suppose when they say you forget all the 'hardship' from labor, it trickles down for the first few months for me. Then my darling husband texts me a picture of her stuck to all those tubes in the NICU and the text says, 'We would have given anything to have her home and crying when she was in the NICU'. True, so true. I did hold her pretty much for 10 hours straight today. She took a few 5 minute cat-naps today, but seemed to want to be attached to my breast or be worn all day. Thank God for slings. She sure is pretty, even with all that newborn acne.

Many of you have sent me emails or have asked me questions in the comments about nursing, long term effects, and our day to day goings on. So, I figured I would just do a little Q and A on the blog. And, yes, I will get to the birth story, preferably before Isabella goes to college.

1. How did those first days go? (Thanks for asking, Jen.)Our first days home with Isabella are such a blur now. I think I was just so elated to have her home finally, that I can't seem to recall too much more than being so thankful. Our first night went really well. She slept so great. The kids all were so helpful and there was a line out the door, just our immediate family, wanting to hold her and cuddle her. I was terribly nervous about nursing, but bit the bullet and dove in. She is a really easy to read baby. She wants to eat ASAP, she hates to be dirty or wet, and then she just wants to sleep. She is starting to really want to be held a lot. The poor girl didn't get any cuddle time for her first week of life!

2. How is the breast feeding going? (Thanks for asking, Jessica.) Those first few days were a bit painful. I hadn't really nursed her, but once, while she was in the hospital, so I was so anxious about it all. Yeah, I have sore nipples, but it is going well now. She is a bit of a sleepy nurser, so I have to really work at keeping her awake. I did go see my beloved lactation specialist this past Tuesday and she gave me great pointers. She also watched Isabella latch on and asked if she was a ventilator baby. I told her 'yes', and she said she could tell since she seemed to be reluctant to open up really wide. She says she sees that a lot in ventilator babies. She recommended I keep my thumb on her chin to apply pressure, and that helped us both a lot. She tanked up really well! She hasn't gained back all her weight yet, but we are getting there. Oh, btw, I love Lansinoh's nipple cream. It has been such a blessing! And, I did try cabbage to ease the soreness the first few days (Thanks for the tip, Jessica!), and that helped a lot, too! I think we will have this down in no time.

3. Is she totally healed or will she have to be on any kind of meds? (Thanks for asking, Dani Joy.) We are praising Jesus that there are no long term effects from Isabella having aspirated the meconium. She is healed and we are so thankful to God first and foremost, to everyone that was praying, and for the advances in medicine. The head NICU nurse did advise us to watch her like a hawk the first year... especially, during flu season. She would be more prone to getting RSV or upper respiratory infections. I am already a bit of a germ-a-phob, so you can imagine how much more I will be once RSV season starts. I haven't even taken her to church yet! I have kept her under wraps here at home and will probably show her off this Sunday as long as I am feeling better. I have felt the effects of this pregnancy and my age a bit harder than the others and have paid for it the past few days.

4. Have you ever had problems getting pregnant? It took 7 months to get pregnant with my first. I was not living a godly lifestyle and it was a shock to me, but the minute I found out I was pregnant with Miguel, I got my act together. I became pregnant with Karizma after stopping the mini-pill for 2 months, in my first marriage. When Tim and I got married, we wished to get pregnant our wedding night. We actually did not get pregnant for 11 months, which ended up in miscarriage. I was heartbroken, even when our OB said we could be pregnant again within 6 weeks. We were pregnant again, with Walker, within 2 months. Next, I got pregnant with Christian after one cycle. And we must have conceived Zack days after God truly convicted Tim and I about my taking the pill (Tim and I want to stress the scientific fact that birth control pills are abortifacients... that is, fertilized eggs(A BABY) will be destroyed.), and I threw them away. For our next child, we went through a lot of conviction, and praying, and crying out to God about having another child, although we knew whole heartedly that God wanted us to trust HIM with our family planning. We always have felt strongly about this, but we too are human and fell once again. The Holy Spirit pointed us in the right direction, yet again, God forgave us and we got pregnant with Isabella about 2 weeks after. So, I am fertile and Tim must have the strongest sperm in the world. So, we have never really experienced the longing that I know many of you may feel. Although, we so longed for that baby that is now with the Lord. 11 months felt like a lifetime, especially when we ended up seeing the pregnancy end so quickly. Just remember, it isn't about how long it takes, how little it takes, but how much you are trusting the Lord. Cling to Jeremiah 29:11 and Psalm 37:4, you lovely daughter of the king, so longing to hold a child. He knows your heart.

5. What is the age difference between Isabella and your next child? Isabella is just over 2.5 years younger than Zack. Most of our children are very close in age: Miguel and Karizma are 20 months apart, then there is a big gap (8 years) since I was remarried. Walker and Christian are 19 months apart, Christian and Zack are 20 months apart. I love having them this close together, because they have a best friend (or two) around all the time. God's timing is perfect. Trust Him with your family planning, your womb, your children, and you will reap the rewards of being fruitful and multiplying. God says that children are a gift from Him... A GIFT! The dictionary says that a gift is 'something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or without its being earned'. My children are a gift that I totally did not deserve or do anything to earn, but God has blessed me with them. So, I will cherish them as the gifts that they are.

6. How is your little girl doing? (Thanks for asking, Ashley.) She is doing well. She does have a really, really bad case of newborn acne. However, all my kids have had it pretty bad. I do feel so bad, though, because she is a little girl and I so long for her skin to be pretty and clear. I admit that is why I haven't taken a bunch of pictures. She is a joy in every way and seeing her smile and recognize me is sheer and utter joy. Nursing her is a privilege, even though I question it at 4 in the morning. Seeing her in little dresses and bows is a thrill to me and I honestly ask myself how I ever lived without her!

Thanks for checking in on me and praying for us. We love you, guys!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

OK, Dani Joy did a caption contest last week. Jessica is doing one this week (head over to submit your entry) . I totally enjoyed the last give away on my blog, so I am joining in on the fun...


I fell in love with this picture taken of my niece, Sonoma ( My SIL, Natalie's, daughter) holding Isabella on the 4th of July. What caption would you give this picture? (There is a prize, yet to be announced... hey, I don't get out much anymore, so I have to go find something, but I will make it good.) Entries will be accepted until Thursday, July 16th, 9pm, pst.

11 Days

Isabella was in the NICU for 11 days. I would say long days, however, I had the privilege of meeting several mommies in the NICU, of babies that have been or will be in the NICU for months. Long months. One of the mommies I met was Diane. She is the proud mommy of Jesus, whom was born just 2 days before Isabella weighing in at a whopping 3 pounds. He is just such a handsome little man, and we became rather fond of him since he was just across the way from Isabella. We would pray for him and keep an eye on what was going on with him to report back to his Mommy when she would return. He was born at 29 weeks and will most likely be in the NICU until August. Diane has 2 other boys at home (8 and 1.5 yrs old) and has to commute from pretty far to come see her little man. Plese pray for her and little Jesus.



I loved how our nurse, Sarah, caught this amazingly cute picture of Isabella and Jesus together. Just as Sarah took the picture Isabella let out a big, gummy grin. She is such a smiley girl. (Don't anyone tell me she doesn't know she is smiling. She will smile at very specific times, like when she makes eye contact with Daddy or is being held by her big sister.)

Two days before Isabella was to go home, I met another mommy. I remember telling Tim that she was there day and night. I thought Tim and I were there the most, but this mommy was in that back corner with her little girl non-stop. When I got the chance to speak with her she shared her story. She was pregnant with twins went into labor at 23 weeks. Her little boy was born that day and did not survive. As she told me about him and his birth day, just 2.5 months before, she cried, but then a smile crossed over her face. She started to tell me about her daughter. Her daughter held out until 23 weeks and 5 days, born at 1.3 pounds , and now, 2.5 months later is doing well. She will most likely be in the NICU approximately 5 months, but this Mommy could not have seemed more happy and thrilled to hear that I was about to take my little girl home soon. I thanked her for her candidness and told her how in awe I was of God and how this little girl had survived. She said, "Yes, she is a miracle." Yes, they all are.

We also had the privilege of meeting Rebecca. She is the mommy of Alliana. Alliana was born weighing 1lb 9ozs, with many muscle issues, and is considered a long term NICU baby. We did have the privilege of being able to pray for her as well and were able to see her go from the incubator to an open crib. What a blessing that was. Rebecca was so inspiring to me. When we discussed her little girl, she said, "She is what my heart has been desiring since I was 5 years old. She is my angel." I told her I would never complain again about how long my baby had been in the NICU. She reminded me that I also was a Mommy longing to have my little girl home with me and that I had every right to feel the way I did. She was so refreshing and like a balm to my soul.

I found that each NICU mommy I spoke with had such hope. They had the best expectations. They smiled and shared their hearts so openly. I was touched by these women. I was the egotistical one thinking God was going to use me in the NICU, but instead he used these other mommies and their babies to grow me in a way that I just can't express in words.

Saying goodbye to these mommies, on our last day, was very bittersweet. As we hugged and they gave us their very sincere well wishes, I couldn't help but feel so heartbroken that they couldn't be taking their babies home, too. Please, say a prayer for all these mommies and their babies.

I can't say I miss our Isabella being in the NICU, but I do miss the wonderful doctors and nurses. I miss the time I got to spend with the other mommies and getting to pray for those sweet babies. I miss holding Isabella for hours on end, without interruption from someone asking for permission to play outside or need help wiping their bottom in the bathroom (Not that I don't love those moments, too). I was blessed with the time to spend some very quality time with my newborn daughter. I was blessed with some time to really see my husband through a different light. I was blessed with the knowledge that prayer really does work and that we are so blesses to have the family and friends that we do. I wouldn't trade this experience for anything.



**I will do my birth story post soon. I have decided to make it a 'mini-series' of sorts, just to keep you guys checking back. I know, I am so bad... but, I just LOVE hearing from you all. xoxo

--------------

On a totally different note:

Go check out Dani Joy's blog and place a vote for the 'name this picture' caption contest. The picture is so stinkin' cute, Dani Joy's blog is such a blessing, and the entry's were very creative!