Thankful Thursday...and a praise report update!!

I am thankful for the wonderful resources available to homeschooling families. We were able to go to Sea World for a VERY discounted price and were able to have my BIL and SIL's family, Dan and Natalie, over at Raising Miracles, join us. God is our faithful provider and we were able to go in without paying for parking and able to have a nice family lunch with Daddy before he had to go back to work.

Here we ALL are (My family in bold face letters, Natalie's in regular, top row: Zoey, Karizma, Myself, Tim, Walker, Elmo, Christian, Miguel, Natalie, Dan. Next row: Zack, holding my hand, Skyler. Bottow row: Sonoma and her 'baby', Gracen, and Tristan. (Sorry, it is so dark, but you know I wasn't going to try and edit this one. I will leave it to someone with actual skills!)


Since Natalie is without child (for the time being), she got the 'joy' of taking the little ones on the teacup type ride. Can you tell how much fun she had??


Waiting for the 'Pet's Rule' show. The kids, including the big ones, LOVED this one!! Who knew the best show at Sea World would have nothing to do with the sea?!?


Zack adores his cousin, Ponoma, as he calls her. Can you tell how much she loves him back?


There were quite a few rides that Christian and Skyler could not go on with their big brothers and cousins, so they were so bummed. I promised Christian he could go take his frustrations out on the punching bags. They had a blast in there.

They have a cute area with some musical instruments that the little ones enjoyed. Zack was making some beautiful music.

Thank you, Jesus, for making it possible for us ALL to go on this trip together. What a gorgeous day it was!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Recently I have been dealing with an issue that is very heavy on my heart. Tim and the pain he has to endure on a day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute, basis. There have been times lately that I have had a serious pity-stinkin'-party on account of all the pain medication he has to take. I start to melt down when I see him have to pop a pill. I will actually leave the room, just so I don't have to watch. I have found that I have some serious resentment towards those little pill's, enough so that I sometimes find myself cursing them under my breath. I have started to see a side of myself I haven't seen since the accident: anger, resentment, hurt, fear, unforgiveness, defeat, and the biggest one, as I mentioned before, pity. Lots of self pity.

Anger: "Lord, I am so angry with that negligent woman! How could she not be paying attention!! She hit my baby's car and now our lives are changed FOREVER! Why is she walking around not having to see what my kids are missing (Daddy picking them up, playing and running around with them). What I am missing (my husband before this ordeal). What my Timmy is missing (sports, roller coasters, life without meds)!!! I am so mad at her, Lord!!!"

Resentment: "Those pills are such a pain, Father. They make my husband tired, have loss of concentration. He isn't the same Timmy, Father. I hate those pills!"

Hurt: "I just want to cry all day about this, Jesus. I am so hurt this is happening to us."

Fear: "What if Tim becomes paralyzed? What if Tim has to stop working? What if I become a young widow? What if, what if, what if...?"

Unforgiveness: "She has to know what she did to us, Lord. I just can't forgive her."

Defeat: "This is too hard. I am prayed out."

Self Pity: "Why me, Lord? Why me?!! It's not fair! I am just going to curl up in a ball in the shower and cry until it goes away!"


Then, I see a man with so much courage, strength, determination. My husband. I am being completely and totally honest when I say I have NEVER seen him have a moment of self pity. I have never witnessed him behave angry, resentful, hurt, with unforgivness in his heart, or defeated about his accident. Of course there have been a few times I have seen him a little fearful. Wouldn't you be? But, he is so quick to finish his moment of fear with a commitment to believing that God has this in the palm of HIS hand and remind me that this body is only temporary and that one day we will both be in heaven in new bodies. Bodies that have no pain. OH, Jesus, the tears of joy that is bringing to my eyes right now. Imagining my husband without pain. It is overwhelming and as I feel the sting of those tears I am humbled by my husband. That he is the one truly suffering, but I have been the one whining and feeling sorry for myself. I have been laying my cross at Tim's feet instead of those of Jesus. I have not been following my own advice. Oh, sweet Jesus, break me. I want to be broken in this area. I want to surrender all these things that have been keeping me bound and feeling heavy. I don't want to focus on the things I don't have. Help me to see what I do have! Such as a husband that still can walk, work, and love me like no one ever has. Children that bless me without ceasing. A baby girl, whom we prayed for, growing in my womb. A family that is so supportive. Friends that love you, and in return love me. A home, food, clothes, a car. So much to be thankful for, Lord. But more than anything, I know I will be in heaven with you, one day. At your feet! What more could I ask for?!?!? I have it all! Having you, Jesus, means I have it ALL!

Please pray for me, Sisters. That I truly remember that the reason Jesus died on the cross was so that I wouldn't have to carry these burdens. That he so wants me to rely fully on Him and seek His guidance and comfort. That I stop and smell all the roses, instead of seeing the dead weeds growing around them. Would you also pray for healing for Tim...and that we, as a family, are open and content to whatever HIS will is for Timmy. I am thankful for your prayers and support.

So, I will, with a very humble heart, say: Thank you, Lord for those pills. Thank you for the medication you provide for my Baby. Thank you for giving us a country where this is available to him. Thank you for the means to pay for insurance and for those prescriptions. Thank you for giving Tim guidance on what to take and what not to take, and help me to keep my non-doctor trained mouth quiet unless it is to encourage and support him.

It has been a very Thankful Thursday.

UPDATE, March 6th, 8:55 am: I just had to post a praise report about what has happened since I posted this. Your prayers were heard and they are being fulfilled in my life. I truly learned so much early yesterday morning. I had to die to myself and give it to Jesus. What liberation came over me when I did. What freedom and joy followed. I was able to ask my husband forgiveness for 'giving him my 2 cents, especially since I have NO knowledge about medicine and any kind of background in the medical field.' We had something come up yesterday evening concerning the new medicine he has to take and can I tell you the Veronica before your prayers and my act of submission would have been back in the shower, wallowing in self pity and anger, but JESUS doesn't want me to bear that cross! What a great and productive conversation it ended up being between Tim and I, and we had a very loving and romantic night. So, take that Satan, you punk!!

Psalm 118:5
In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free.